When Reality Sets In

Almost a week ago, I gathered up the courage to go get my physical, bloodwork;  EKG and all. I wanted to get a real picture of where my health stands. Well, the news is less than desirable. My blood pressure and EKG were good, however,  I have high cholesterol, which I take very seriously. Which also tells me that up until now, I have to admit I myself that I wasn't taking it seriously enough. Geez, I've already given up sugar and white flour, now I have to drastically lower fat as well! I actually didn't think I was taking in that much fat, but drastic steps in my lifestyle obviously have to be taken. Now, of course, as is my nature, I'll start to do research in low cholesterol diets and the foods that increase cholesterol.  I'm good at the research, not good at the practice.  I scheduled a recheck with the doctor for weight and blood in 3 months, so let the games begin!! Ok, so what changes will I make first?

Let me say that I HAVE NO IDEA!! Just when I'm thinking I'm doing pretty well, and I've got my mind wrapped around a no added sugar or white flour diet, I'm forced to revamp it again. By the way, my blood sugar was just fine. So I'm sufficiently confused. I usually eat pretty good foods, nothing ever fried, don't eat out a lot, I just thought the amount of calories were off.  Maybe it would be time to consult a nutritionist.  But, I have to do something TODAY, so what I did the obvious, I made my usual food choices, this time being very aware of the fat and cholesterol in them.  I did come across some eye openers, that I thought I should have known, but maybe didn't want to.  Like chocolate and most dairy (that's not fat free).  I'm big on dairy, love cheese, and of course, the chocolate addiction goes without saying.  Actually, my chocolate weakness/obsession was what got me to give up sugar in the first place.  I had a relatively short time period when I was allowing myself to eat chocolate without chaperoning myself.  Perhaps that's where my cholesterol took a leap.

Obesity itself is a contributor or high cholesterol, which of course, I'm working on.  So, I'm making the tweaks and trying hard not to get discouraged.  But, my main purpose of this post is to try to get others who are afraid to go for a checkup to do so.  You have a pretty good idea of what your lifestyle is, and perhaps, what it should be.  But what you don't know is how that lifestyle is affecting your body, how your body is handling it.  I didn't realize my cholesterol issue, but now I do.  I also found out that I am perpetually dehydrated.  I definitely have my father's makeup.  We are prone to kidney stones, so staying hydrated is crucial!  Prevention is the key to long time health!

I am becoming aware that my way of staying motivated is to keep changing the focus of my health, meaning, trying new healthy foods, trying healthy new tricks, to keep me excited.  I don't try anything that will affect my weight negatively, and I try different ways of eating.  I don't want to get bored and discouraged, so variety is the way to protect myself from that.  I love food, healthy as well as not (except veggies, which are a constant trial for me, thus I ingest Macro Greens to get the nutrients and enzymes I need), so I want to use that to my advantage.

I'll take these steps to improve my health, and I am happy to do so.  Of course, I'll report how low my cholesterol is after the 3 months is up.  So many things to think about...

Why am I So Afraid?

After reading, listening and watching a lot of books and media, it has become clear that I have to make some radical changes in my diet. The fact is inevitable, I suppose. First, i'll explain how I came to rhis conclusion, then I'll tell what the changes are.

All these years, and all these programs have always been done with a certain amount of safety.

I've known this fact for a long time, probably a really long time, but I am scared to death to take the plunge. What in the world could be so scary, you say? Well, basically I would have to say goodbye to 2 of my main sources of comfort. Plus the fact that I've relied on my buddies for 25 years! On my left side would be my old friend sugar, and on my right side, meet carbohydrate. They have seen me through some tough times, and have helped me recoup after a long day. This is a profound realization to me, to be faced with the idea of stopping my consumption of these wonderful beings actually is sending me into a panic. Can you say addiction? I never, NEVER would have categorized myself in that stigma, but now I know it must be true. Of course in response to this panic, where do I turn? You guessed it! S&C!  Once coming to this conclusion, I engaged in a full blown binge.  And, boy, am I pissed!  Pissed at all the people who were bringing this reality to the forefront of my mind.  Just so you know, all you folks who think that it's funny to  torture sugary people, I hate you!

Ok, my tantrum is over, the panicky feeling is not, however.  I know what must be done, and I intend to do it.  My husband ensures me that I am strong enough to do this, I wish I could be so sure.  But, I know that I'm in for a slew of medical issues is I don't get rid of this vice.

So, I am formally making an announcement.  As of tomorrow (or today, since you are reading this when I post it), I am off sugar and white flour!  I will be writing about my experience in detail, in case anyone is contemplating this huge undertaking as well, so you know what to expect.  I've read that it takes about 3 days for the sugar cravings to wear off, let's just see if they are right.  If they are not, then I will put forth the truth to all.

As a side note, there will be only one thing I will allow sugar in, and that is my coffee.  That would be 1 sugar cube of added sugar a day.  And I intend to wean myself off that, so it would be sugarless coffee, too.  Another side note, I don't intend to become a sugar substitute fanatic.  Personally, aside from truvia (stevia), I hate artificial sweeteners.  Don't like the taste or the aftertaste. so this is for real.  I'm not just substituting everything sugary with its splenda twin.  I intend these changes to aim toward health, and I don't believe a lot of chemicals ingested are the correct direction.

Wish me luck!  I will see you on the other side of the bakery aisle!  That would be, what, produce?  Well, whatever...


*Disclaimer: Despite all said above, no, I have not had a diagnosis of diabetes, or pre-diabetes or anything of the like.  This is all done of my own free will...and I think I might just be out of my mind.

How to Start a Successful Day of Weight Loss

A good, strong day starts the night before. Giving yourself a good night's sleep, or in my case, a night with as few interruptions of sleep as possible, can set the stage for success. This isn't always possible, I know, and there will be days when we will drag ourselves out of bed dreading the coming day. But for today, let's just focus on those days that we wake up feeling pretty good.

Then comes time for the pep talk.  It has to be when you're alone and have no, I mean, NO distractions.  I usually do this in the shower.  So let's have a little chat with ourselves.  No, don't ask how the weather is, which is sometimes as much as we really tune into ourselves.  I mean, tell yourself, out loud, how you intend your day to be and how you intend your choices to be.  "Today is going to be a good day.  I will stay calm, I will stay under control, and I will enjoy something other than food."  Whatever you want your intentions to be for today, say those intentions.  Make them really good ones, if you want, whatever it takes to get you amped up to make the effort.  And dialogue that's very decisive and positive can make a real difference in how we feel like tackling the day.

Have you ever noticed that if you've had a bad night, or bad previous day, it's real easy to feel sorry for yourself the next morning?  And what have I done on days like this?  I've said, internally, of course, "you deserve to take it easy on yourself today.  It'll take too much energy, which I don't have, to eat well today".  So what happens?  I have a breakfast loaded with carbs and probably sugar instead of protein, which makes me feel even more sleepy as the day goes on.  Bad idea.  Always start your day with intentions, positive intentions, whatever they may be.  Set your standards for your day really high, so it's something really good to shoot for.

Also, make small goals for yourself, I make mine every month.  So if I can't find any positive intent, I at least have a goal that I'm reaching for, it makes it easy for my mind to grasp that when I'm not so awake, alert, or willing.

Enlist the people around you to keep you motivated and accountable during the day.  Family, friends, coworkers, the guy sitting next to you on the bus.  Tell them to ask you what you're having for lunch, to ask you if you've exercised today.  Or just let them know that you're trying to change your lifestyle, so be ready for you talk about it.

As a last point, my husband and I have begun to start our day with something called Macro Greens.  Neither of us eat as many veggies as we should, and this powder (mixed with apple juice and water), provides more than our daily allotment in 1 scoop.  I swear it has given me more energy.  It's organic, as well.

I've almost never had a "perfect" day of health eating and exercise, but the components of a healthy lifestyle are many, so strive toward the goal, don't be stalled by the bumps!

Time to Take Stock

Periodically, it's imperative to stop, step back, and take stock of where I am in my weight loss efforts.  It has been 8 weeks that I've been logging my food and increasing my exercise.  In that time, I have lost 10 pounds.  that averages, what, 1 1/4 pounds per week.  Ok, that makes me feel a little better, and can you guess why?  I was being hard on myself, which, of course, I'm very good at.  I didn't think I was doing losing fast enough.  But in looking back, I am now aware that I am right on track with healthy weight loss.  It definitely wouldn't hurt to amp it up some, like tweaking my eating and starting to weight train at the gym and at home.  The point is, though, after 2 months of the effort, I thought I was doing a crappy job of it.  I didn't really realize that my efforts aren't crappy and are having an effect!  I'm happy about this!

I have to continually think forward, though, and what should be my question to myself at this point?  Where are the areas on this journey that can be improved.  I heard in a podcast Cut The Fat Weight Loss * that when a person is trying to lose weight, their diet is 95% of the solution.  And if we don't have a lot of time to devote to diet and exercise in our schedule, then what time we do have should be devoted to diet first.  This was a little aha moment for me, because up until now, I automatically thought that exercise should be the focus is there is little time, and I would burn off any extra calories.  But it makes sense that I should be putting extra time in the planning and the cooking of the right kinds of foods to eat, so there is less guess work and last minute decision making.  

So, the goal for this week is to do some tweaking of diet and exercise.  Specifically, is to plan out my menu so I can shop for the right things, and I'll add my kids brown bag lunches as well, so there is no guess work.  How nice that feeling would be!  In regards to exercise, I'm going to focus on resistance training, which I love!

Now, however, I am going to take a moment, though, to fully congratulate myself for losing 10 pounds!  I am definitely capable of doing it, and doing it to the end!  Who is with me?!?  

*I listen to health and weight loss podcasts for motivation and for reiteration of health information.  The more ingrained it is, the better!  Besides, I used to do a weight loss podcast back in 2007, so I enjoy that sort of media.  

I Just Don't Wanna!

There are days when doing it, any of it, are downright daunting.  With my husband doing well in his job, which requires a ton of his time and, consequently, mine, and the five kids, one of which is a 5 month old, days and nights are nothing but work.  We've gotten into such a cycle of work that this has become the norm.  So what happens?  We feel guilty when we aren't working!  How sick is that?  But it shows us how adaptable and capable our bodies and minds are.  All this working was a slow progression, with the addition of each child, and the promotions of my husband at his job.  We've reached a fevered pitch, and we in danger of burnout if we don't start stopping.

So there are times, and I suppose always will be, when we wake up and say, I just don't wanna do it today! We are most likely depleted in some way, emotionally or physically or both.  Our resolve is paper thin, and any temptation can and most likely will be succumbed to.  So how can I keep the damage to a minimum until my resolve is more sustaining?  Remembering that living healthy is a lifestyle change, and not a temporary state is important.  There are ebbs and flows in life, in every aspect of it.  When it comes to health, on days like this, when we want to give up and give in, I say, just relax about it.  Calmly remember why I'm losing weight and exercising, and what my goal is.  Also remembering how far I've come since the start of the journey.  I have to go back to my motivators and get juiced up again be watching some weight loss youtube videos.

I'm also learning to be honest about how I feel about eating, and about what and how much I eat.  I suppose this is what accountability looks like.  I'm a closet eater, and have been for a long time, and have started doing so with my husband and children.  This is a dangerous habit, especially because kids are really smart, and pick up on my habits, good or bad.  And guess what?  Yep, my mom was a closet eater, meaning, she used to keep a stash all for herself, and I always found it because I always knew where to look.  Anyway, talking about how I was feeling with my husband helped a lot.  I was honest, I told him that I felt like stuffing my face with, well, just about anything, it didn't matter what.  My strength and energy for that moment (actually it was a few hours) was really low, and my goals looked a long way off.  But if you talk to other people about it, they can be objective, and remind you really well of why you're doing it.  Basically talk you down off the ledge.  And it actually worked!  I didn't overeat, I ate within my daily limits, with the help of a midday hemp protein shake.  I'm going to give myself props and say how proud I am of myself!! This is a big hurdle, although I didn't realize it until I was re-telling the tale.  Overcoming the hard days are possible, if you arm yourself ahead of time, because they will come.  Talk to someone about it.  If anyone wants to talk to me on a hard day, please find me on my Facebook page  or Twitter @Beth_Spellacy.  

Luckily, I wrote the beginning of this post on a day that I was tired and emotionally worn out, and not from trauma, just the stress and pressures of everyday life.  Why lucky?  Because I wrote it when it was happening, so it's very real.  I'm finishing it the day after, and I can tell you that the feeling does pass, thank you God!  So I know these days will come again, and I'll be ready.  Will you?

Get Behind Me Sara Lee

It's amazing how my resolve to lose weight and get healthy goes down the tubes when I'm physically or emotionally drained.  So, of course, my intentions in the morning are good, while at the end of the day, I'm ready to throw in the towel, spouting that it's just too much effort.  What do I do for that situation?  Well, since I can't control how I'm going to feel, although I can assume that I'm going to be tired at the end of the day, I can control the food that goes into my mouth.  I'm an end of the day eater, that's how I relax after all 5 kids are asleep.  I do deserve to relax, and I've always thought that eating was a reward.  I have to change that attitude now, which makes me want to cry.  Why?  Because I still want to relax, and in my mind at this point, I can't think of anything that is as relaxing and satisfying as eating.  So I have to break it down and evaluate and plan while my resolve is high.

I have to plan out ahead of time what I'm going to eat when I finally sit down at night.  Eliminating my night time snack is out of the question, I know myself too well.  I would never keep up with it, and I would probably end up binging.  So let's explore.  First thing is to get my head on straight and say my statement, "I only eat a little snack at night".   I must say that to myself in the evenings ahead of time to set the stage.  Since I've already planned out what it is I'm going to eat, and I've made it a good snack, something I like, I won't be scoping out the fridge later on.  I think also adding a hot drink, like decaf coffee (I find it very comforting) or tea added to the snack, would be a good idea.  Then I can sip, and it will last a lot longer than the snack.  The whole idea is comfort at the end of a long day.

I will be trying this tonight.  I'll be making decaf coffee and a piece of cinnamon toast (whole grain bread, of course!) should do the trick.  If this is an issue for you, try these same steps along with me, and let me know how it goes!

Start to Make Health a Knee-Jerk Reaction

I actually remember a time when I was making really good choices in the food i ate.  I also remember that I had no remorse about it, it actually felt great to do so.  Of course, you have to know what choices are better than others in the first place.  If you haven't grown up in an environment that fostered healthy food, then you might need to educate yourself in what exactly the better choices are.  My education has been going on for 25 years, so at this point it's not hard for me to know which foods are good for me and which aren't.  But not all people have received this education, so the education has to start at some point.  How about now?  There's so much information out there in regards to nutrition, much more than in past years, so we have no excuse to not know how to eat.  There might be a why behind why we eat a certain way, but let's put that aside for now.  Having the knowledge, in this case, really does give you power, the power to make good, informed decisions easier.  When we're standing in the supermarket with an thousand cereals staring us in the face, it would be very empowering to know which is the right one, wouldn't it?

So start educating yourself as to the right way to eat.  Start small, of course, one element of eating at a time.  Remember, this isn't conquering why we eat, just what we should eat.  Here are a few beginning concepts to get the ball rolling in the right direction:

1.  Buy whole grain.  This is a big statement, I know, but it can be easy.  White flour turns to sugar in your body very quickly, so you have to stop eating it.  There are so many choices in stores now, there's no excuse.  And it's easy to choose the whole wheat or whole grain alternative to your favorite breads, rice, etc. There are a ton of yummy fiber, protein, whole grain rich breads out there, so no more wonder bread!  Make the statement, I don't eat white bread*, and start buying the brown breads.  This includes english muffins, bagels, hamburger and hot dog buns, too.  It's all out there, so start making that choice instead.

2.  Stop eating and drinking fake sugars.  Splenda is found in a lot of places nowadays.  That, and other artificial sweeteners.  You would think these remove some calories from your diet, but artificial sweeteners are chemicals (plus much more bad stuff) and you really shouldn't consume them.  Doctors tell pregnant women not to eat it, what does that tell you?  Go for truvia, which is a natural sugar from the stevia plant, instead.  It's found in the sugar aisle.  A popular, and easy to find drink to boost your water, is Crystal Light's Pure variety.  And cut down or cut out sugary drinks.  As Jillian Michaels says "Don't drink your calories!".  Start drinking water, cut and dried, nice and simple.

3.  Don't eat a lot of red meat.  Sausages for breakfast, ham sandwich for lunch, hamburger for dinner.  You just ate close to your weekly allotment for red meat.  Be conscious of how much you eat.  Again, many times, ground turkey, ground chicken, or soy products (like boca burgers) can be substituted for many red mean meals.  Try it, and remember to add a lot of spice!  Original Mrs. Dash works well in so many dishes.

We all want to get to a point where making these healthy choices will become second nature, without any emotion attached to it.  That only comes with positive, decisive statements, and practice!

*If you look back at my previous post Motion to Motivate, step 5 explains the process of making statements that mimic how we ultimately want to be.  Yesterday, I used the statement out loud, "Don't get a doughnut for me, honey, I don't eat donuts".  And it tricked my mind in to believing the statement was true, that the decision was already made and I didn't need to make it again.  It absolutely worked, and there was no willpower involved.  Very powerful!!

Ok, I know I've been posting a lot of information in regards to the science of weight loss, but now will come real posts on the real challenge I am facing now in losing weight.  There are so many nuances of losing weight and the amount of things that go through my head every day is staggering.  I've think about food and losing weight all the time, all day long, and I have to share some of it with you all so we can build a community and do it together!  Come back and see!

Natural, Calm, Relaxed Discipline!

I'm quickly learning that in order for being slim to be a permanent part of life, it has to be part of your way of thinking. Not an obsession, but a mindset. An acceptance that what is available to us is not, most of the time, what we should consume.

Health and true weight loss and permanent slimness depends on calm assurance of what we know is true: low fat, whole grain, smaller portions, fruits and vegetables, water, exercise. There can be a slight detour to partake of celebration, then a return to healthful eating to maintain health. But that detour has to be controlled and calm with awareness ad consciousness so as not to go overboard. I am aware that I can go overboard if I decide I don't want to enter that realm of health eating.

I can actually see that it's 2 different types of mindset that I waffle between, no accounting for what I eat, no thought as to healthy type of food or portions and very seldom exercise. And usually no motivation accompanies this mindset to be better than the very worst. It's like all or nothing. This is the all side.

The other mindset is the healthy side, the nothing side. But it can't be nothing, because it calls to mind punishment, deprivation, lack of fun, like I don't deserve to eat anything that I like. Did I say PUNISHMENT??

No, healthful eating is NOT punishment! There is not an elite group of lucky people out there who are allowed to eat whatever junk they want in huge portions and can still maintain their health. NO-ONE! The human body is not made that way, it's purely scientific. Our bodies cannot maintain health by eating wrong and not moving. We are capable of so much more than what we expect from ourselves.

Ignite Your Health & Weight Loss Engine

In all the years of trying to shave the padding off of this body, I've been motivated by many things.  In my teens, peer pressure was the driving force, and, of course, boys.  The desire to look like everybody else, to wear clothes that were in style, or close too it in my size and feel comfortable in those clothes, was a huge motivator.  Fast forward a few years to college and the motivation was definitely to have a relationship, which I realize is a very petty reason.  But, I also started realizing at that point that I was beginning the grown up stage of my life, and I viewed being heavy to being immature, not taking life seriously enough to control myself.

In my dating years, or my 20's, weight loss was probably motivated by insecurity in who I was dating, that I would lose whoever it was if I didn't look a certain way.  Let me say, though, that even though I felt insecure, I never really got down to a healthy weight.  When I married my husband, we both married for reasons much deeper and real than looks, although we were and are very attracted to each other.  And with that security of a real love, I started to gain weight.  Then the motive to lose weight at that time was not strong at all, just an overall knowledge that I should weigh less to look better in clothes.

Then came the pregnancies...all 5 of them.  And I gave myself complete permission to satisfy any and all hunger and non hunger feelings I had.  And my motivation after each of those had been to try to get my old figure back, such as it was.  But I never really did get down completely, I held on to about 10 pounds each time, telling myself that I was close enough to what I was.  Well, 4 pregnancies and 40 pounds in was much different than where I was when I conceived my oldest.

Before I got pregnant this last time (#5), the motivation to lose weight had been to try to get regain some of physical fitness of my always overweight body, that had somehow slipped away, over only a few years.  I have to admit, I was always in denial about how much weight I really had to lose, I guess my body type allowed the weight to be carried well.  After all the weight gain, that was no longer the case, and it snuck up on me!  I guess I was busy with the kids.  What the hell is this?  I'm closing in on 40 and I don't look or feel anywhere close to what I used to.  This was never an issue before, and surprising enough, it was the "how I feel" part that was really getting to me, more than the fact that I now had more gray hair and wrinkles.  So I did start to lose weight and exercise, more frequently and kept up longer than ever before.  I guess this reason was a good motivator!  I was starting to feel better again physically, even though I had only lost a small percentage of weight.  The payoff this time was more tangible than any other time before.

So, obviously up until now, none of those other motivating factors were strong enough to do the trick.  And now I have a good tool in my weight loss belt knowing what is.

Here we are now, in the present, weight back up again, starting over further away from the goal.  Over the years, I have realized what the real reasons why the weight stayed on were, and I suggest everybody find out what their reasons are, as well.  I think at some point, I'll have to do some research about therapy and weight loss.  As for right now, doing some soul searching and looking carefully back to uncover the real reasons for why the weight came on, and stayed on, is important.  But after we know these reasons, we still have to do something with them, meaning we still have to do the work to get our weight where we want it to be.  This is where the driving forces, or motivators come in.

I have hit the proverbial wall with my latest motivator: fear!  I'm now 40, in the category of obese, and at risk of all kinds of health problems that could start happening any time now.  I've always prided myself with the longevity of my family, and their ability to hold onto their health well into old age.  And for some unknown reason, I assumed in my younger years that this history would propel me in the same direction with little effort on my part.  Well,  I realized quickly that these people spend their lives healthy, not heavy.  I could very possibly not inherit their health history.  Boy howdy, this fear is definitely a good motivator!  It goes down to the core of human instinct, survival.  I also feel very strongly about living my 50's 60's and seventies in health, not living them with the dependencies of doctors and medication.  I want to be older and well, not older and sick.


Now, many people have to hit rock bottom to get it in gear, however, I would prefer not to get to that point. But is fear a good ignitor for my weight loss engine?  In my opinion, yes.  But only for the short term, in the beginning of any weight loss or health efforts.  It's survival of the fittest, and having a real picture of how your lifestyle is affecting your body is extremely important.  However, fear should absolutely NOT be a long term motivator.  Fear is good at giving you a starting boost, but negative forces in our lives are never good. The things that continue to propel you forward should be positive, the payoffs to weighing less and eating right.

If everybody could dig up some good reason to start on the road to wellness that are really effective driving forces, and slowly transition them to stable, positive, tangible daily motivators,  then maybe we can lick this, once and for all!  I've heard too many people say how good health feels to say it's a bunch of hooey.  Maybe, just maybe, they're right!

Motion to Motivate

This time last year, things were going smoothly.  I was exercising many times a week, and had lost over 20 pounds.  I was well on my way to the finish line.  Well, that line turned out not to indicate the end of my weight struggles, but the beginning of new ones.  Namely, it was the line on a pregnancy test that sealed my weight fate.  In the perfect world of "fit pregnancies", beautiful women with beautiful baby bumps, a fifteen pound gain, nothing more.  Well,  I come from a long line of baby makers. I'm proud to be the mother of five, be a sister of 4 siblings and be the granddaughter of a remarkable woman who bore 13.  And we carry "big ".   So with that said,  family history and my own history foretold that I was again foreseeing a 9 month long, 50 pound setback.  

But I had high hopes for this pregnancy,  since I had been on such a good run with exercise and weight loss.  The pregnancy progressed quickly,  and something bizarre happened.  I gained the most during this pregnancy, and the why is still haunting me.  Now here I exist, gorgeous, sweet baby girl in arm (who, by the way, weighed 8lbs 8 oz,  not at all justifying a 60 pound gain) still holding 50 pounds of baby weight and 30 pounds of pre-baby weight.  Excuse me but what the hell happened?  And to wrap my head around getting on a weight loss regimen again was daunting at best.  It was just too huge to comprehend.  So, how did I get back on the wagon?  It didn't happen automatically, or easily.  There was a method, and here it is.

Now for the nuts and bolts of having the motivation to start and finish a weight loss program.  First, the important thing to know is that you do not get motivation, you have to build it! What does that mean? Building motivation means you must let the excitement of doing something great for yourself grow inside you.  And you can get this excitement by doing some specific things.  Let it get super exciting by going through the steps to growing motivation.

-Step 1: Remember what worked in the past.  Was it a particular weight loss program or a particular aspect of it?  Get out the little details of what worked for you and remember them in any way that is most natural and second nature.  Every program has nice little elements, why not take those elements for your own use.  For me, using loseit (www.loseit.com) worked really well.  I never liked tracking my food, but loseit is free and an excellent program.

-Step 2: Add something new that will work with where you are now in your life.  You might have a new job that affords you the ability to walk during lunch, a new salad bar in the cafeteria, or a great health food restaurant in the area.  Or if you're at home with the kids, revamping your shopping trip to include organic foods for the whole family in exchange for the pop tarts.  Be specific, ensure that it's easy to do, and make it reality!

-Step 3: Put 1 & 2 together.  Personalize your program to what works specifically for you and your situation.  You are the expert of exactly what you need to lose weight.  Write it down, make it pretty (or manly) make it YOURS!  

-Step 4: Remove any triggers for old behaviors.  **This I found to be very effective!**  Control your environment. OK, what does that mean?  We hear those words all over the place but what is it really talking about? 

•  It means removing food network from your TV watching. 
•  It means inundating yourself with TV that will motivate you, in my case, it just happened to be the start of the Olympics.  So, of course, those hardbodies are going to motivate anybody into getting into shape and getting into a program.  The timing was good, but the key is to build the motivation with inspiration.  The fact that I like watching the Olympics was a definite bonus.
• It means reading Shape magazine instead of Gourmet. 
• It means listening to inspiring podcasts, like Jillian Michaels, or reading success stories of others who have conquered the weight.  Weight Watchers has a facebook page that posts success stories. 
• It means joining or starting something to be near people on the same road, like this blog, a walking club, or simply a buddy for awesome support.  
• Then the obvious, it means surrounding yourself with great food.

-Step 5: Start using "I do" and "I don't" statements, even if they're not wholly true yet.   Start thinking and making statements that are saying how you want to be as if you're already there.  These are the ones I use, "I don't eat fast food", " I love exercise, it feels really good", "I don't eat between meals" " I drink mainly water" "I don't eat after 7:00"  Tackle those challenges by just saying to yourself and out loud how you want to think, and eventully those statements will become real.  My big one it "I don't eat by myself".  I'm a closet eater, I eat mostly when I'm alone, because I have a feeling of shame associated with how I eat.  These statements are not supposed to sound like things you're trying to convince yourself of, they sound like things you're already decided about.  Equate your statements to the other statements you make in life, like "I don't smoke", with that much decisiveness.  They are very empowering statements.  Start making these statements today!  Today, I will say "I don't eat full fat ice cream", when I'm picking it out at the store later.  Internally, I'm proud to be part of the group of people that don't eat full fat ice cream. I actually want to try making my own, so I have control over ingredients. "Automatic Ice Cream Maker (Blueberry)" (Google Affiliate Ad)    But I digress.

Some of these steps won't last for a long time, but some will.  The key for right now is to build your motivation to grab your health in both hands and take back control.  When is right now, though?  This important, too.  Right now is when you know you're ready, not when someone tells you it's time.  Build the motivation to carry you through the first leg of the journey. 

Reboot...

So, a little introduction. I am Beth Spellacy, a chaos manager, which means I am a stay at home mom of 5 beautiful children, and manage the chaos that ensues within it. And no, this is not why I have a weight problem, although it's a darn good reason. I mean, it's a symptom of the real reason. The why's of my initial weight gain are definitely significant, but I will address that whole can of worms in another post, right now I want to start with where I am today. The past is gone, and the future hasn't happened yet, so all we really have is now, anyway.

The idea of a rebooting my efforts in conquering this weight problem is very motivating...and extremely annoying! That I am again embarking arm in arm with this very old friend of mine is truly unbelievable, but not because the company is bad. Let's face it, I've known this side of myself for 25 years now, so you could say I know her pretty damn well, and she's the side that cares about me. So why wouldn't I want to be around her, right?

I hate the concept of "reinventing" myself, which isn't an accurate description anyway. I'm still me, but having reached the age of 40, I, therefore, have been practically slapped with the very real fact that I have spent more of my life dieting than not. So what I know about this is, let's say, A LOT! My knowledge on nutrition, exercise and my awareness of the psychology related to keeping my excess weight has been accumulating since I was 15. I never tried fad diets, but usually fell to exercise and eating less and trying to eat better.

I can't deny that living a healthier lifestyle has been far more satisfying, meaning, it feels better. If you've ever tried eating well and exercising, even for a short amount of time, you know what I'm talking about. Yeah, that feeling. Why wouldn't I want to keep doing something that feels good? Because, yes, truly, food does feel good, too, and it's much easier to do, isn't it? Am I inherently lazy? Maybe, or maybe there's just so much tied into eating that my mind just can't deal with it, so actually eating is the much easier thing to do, emotionally. Whether going the health road is the easy road or the hard road, I haven't decided, but it is the much more preferred road. Why? Because it gives to me so much more than it takes from me. So I choose that road. And I'm going to want company, because misery loves company! Just kidding, I want company because when we share knowledge and experience, we have so many more tools in our tool belt to fix things that break or are broken.

So, I am going to start my efforts again in the concentration of grasping this all important health. I have been through 5 pregnancies, all of which have left weight on me. It's time to keep the memories of those in my mind and not on my body.

Now, I want to gain support from others and offer support to those who are struggling the same way, since I am certain this is how it must be done to finally see success and have it be permanent. So please subscribe and join me this one, last time.


Sneak peak for next post: How I gained the motivation to start again.